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WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF MARY WAS A 21ST CENTURY NIGERIAN

Let us assume for a moment that Nigeria is the ancient day Bethlehem. It is where the entire nativity activities take place. Oh! Yea! Mary is some downtown girl in some ghetto. She is apparently the only virgin in her hood. No broken hymen. She is the church girl and the lead chorister in her church. She has never been to the club. Laud! She doesn’t know how the inside of a dance hall looks like. She fills her phone with Frank Edwards music, Chioma Jesus, Nathaniel Bassey’s and the like. No! Mary doesn’t wear trousers, nor make up, no earrings. Look at that much in! She is so so naturally beautiful with a long dark thick Afro and smooth coffee brown skin that is the envy of every girl. Sure enough she has got curves-voluptuous ones that gets all the guys reeling when they see her. Her magnificent figure is not concealable even with the baggy skirts and gowns she puts on.

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Dude! You don’t expect Mary to be that conservative, do you? She sure has a crush, no she has a lover; The only boy she has eyes for. His name is Joseph. Joseph is the local carpenter who makes the chairs and tables for the local church and the primary school nearby. He also repairs wobbly chairs, fixes doors and tables. You gar that, he was the town carpenter. Joseph too loves Mary and they are planning to get married after Mary finishes from Secondary School. Parents, friends, relatives and even the towns people all know about their relationship.

The bomb happens. Mary starts having morning sickness, gets sleepy all the time, her attendance in the class and church begins to reduce. GBOOAH! The big bang happens. Mary is now like a swollen thick. Her pregnancy is no more concealable. Joseph discovers it and threatens to break the engagement. It is a very big shame that Mary does not know who is responsible for it but she still insists that she is a Virgin. Bloggers and newspapers cover the story and………. She don enter. All that holy holy for nothing. Ashawo like her they say. Slow water runs fast they cuss.

One day Angel Gabriel appears to Joseph and tells him to marry Mary that the holy spirit is responsible. Joseph wakes up and goes to Mary’s house, tells her parents his revelation, apologizes to Mary and decides to marry her. There is no wedding pomp just an in-house bride price celebration. The relatives and towns people all have a great laugh about it. Mary is the latest topic on Whats App group chats, Facebook posts, Instagram updates and the trending memes. Poor Mary! She is sad but she is encouraged because she is carrying the savior of Nigeria. The one who will liberate Nigerians from the hands of the corrupt leaders and system; A savior both economically and political.

Joseph and Mary are tired of it all and decide to relocate to America via Ghana. America’s economy is better compared to Nigeria; plus Jesus will behave like an Americana, have greater health and education privileges. At the airport in Ghana Mary goes into labor and there is no hospital around except an uncompleted building opposite the airport. They go in there without a midwife and Joseph has no credit on his phone to call friends. He is both the midwife and nurse. After 30 minutes Mary gives birth on a heap of clothes and Baby Jesus cries attract the airport officials. In a vision 3 powerful pastors from Ethiopia hear about it and come to pay homage to the savior of Nigeria, the liberator.

The news fills the air that even Obama and Trump hear about it. All the presidents of the world proclaim a public holiday in honor of this birth.

Aye! Its crazy right but check it out wouldn’t it be the way if Mary was some Nigerian girl.

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Ekycentric

Ekycentric is my name. I love messy beds and writing over a plate of beans. I enjoy traveling and randomly clicking at landscape pictures. when I am not writing I am grooming my Afro hair or thinking about the crazy way the world spins.

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